Alex & Kimberly
Alex & Kimberly
“Alex… what is on the wall? Is that poop??” Spoiler: It was poop.
Let’s back up. One night our newborn daughter Abby woke up crying with a wet diaper and it was Alex’s turn. It was a completely routine 3 AM diaper change – until it wasn’t. Let’s just say Abby had a bit of an accident when her diaper was off and it made more than a little mess.
So when Kim discovered poop on the wall the next morning and asked Alex about it, all he could do was laugh. Kim felt bad he had to clean up the mess in the middle of the night, but she laughed with him.
That story is just a small example of how we roll. We’re laid back, we don’t take ourselves too seriously, but we do everything in the world for our daughter – including cleaning up stinky messes at 3 AM.
Our Story
We met in 2007, in our freshman year in college. We became good friends and started dating about a year after we met with a little persistence by Alex. It was a bit of an awkward transition going from good friends to dating at first, but it didn’t take too long to realize we are perfect for each other. We were married shortly after graduating from college in 2012.
Before we were ready to start a family, we knew adoption would be a wonderful and likely choice for us. Kim was adopted by her dad at a young age. Her first cousin was also adopted, so she knows the joy, challenges, and love that comes from growing a family through adoption. A couple of years into our marriage, we discovered it would be unlikely for us to have any children biologically, so we started down the path of adoption.
In 2019, we were lucky enough to be chosen by a birth mother to adopt our daughter Abigail. Since Abby was born, we have stayed in close contact with her birth mother, and we are now very close with both her and her family. Adoption has brought so much extra love and family into our life and we are very excited and hopeful to be able to grow our family even more by adopting another child.
Our Relaxation & Fun
When we’re home and looking to unwind, we love to watch a good show together on the couch with a bowl of popcorn. We especially love watching Jeopardy on the nights we get Abby in bed before the show starts. We also like to play board games or card games, do a puzzle, relax in our three season room and hang with our cats, or cook a meal together.
As a family we love to get out of the house with Abby. We often take her to our local library where she can play with other kids, check out a bunch of books for her, and Kim can pick out a book for herself too. We also love taking Abby to see animals at the zoo, having play dates with other kids her age at a local splash pad, and pool time or sledding at Alex’s parents’ house.
Alex loves to move from one hobby to the next. He currently enjoys playing in a darts league with friends, playing video games like Rocket League, Call of Duty, and Overwatch with his buddies, snowboarding with coworkers, and fishing or golfing with his brother.
Kim’s ideal day is to relax with a cup of coffee, a blueberry muffin, and a good book or Netflix show. She also enjoys playing The Sims video game, crocheting, coloring, watching documentaries, cross-stitching, cooking yummy desserts, and spending quality time with family.
our adoption hopes
Gender: Any Gender, including an Ambiguous or Transitioning Gender Child
Ethnicities: Caucasian,
Age: Newborn to 12 Months
Total of: 1 Child
a snapshot
of us
We Live In: Kalamazoo
Our Faith: Open to All Religions
Pets: Cat(s)
Kids Already: One Child Now
Child Care Plan: Family Member Child Care Licensed Child Care Center
Our Family & Friends
We see both Alex and Kim’s family pretty often along with Abby’s birth family.
On Alex’s side, we see his parents weekly. Alex’s mom watches Abby one day a week which Abby loves. She will do this for our second child also. She’s retired and loves nothing more than playing with Abby who is currently the only grandchild on both sides of the family. Abby loves playing with Alex’s dad too who can be a big goofball and makes funny voices to get Abby laughing. We see Alex’s brother and sister every month or two. Alex loves to watch sports with his brother Robby, and Rachel loves to stop by to see Abby.
On Kim’s side, we see her parents monthly. We either drive to the east side of Michigan to visit them or they’re happy to drive here to visit us. Kim’s mom loves to babysit and often asks for opportunities to do so. They’ll do crafts, bake cookies, or go on adventures to places like the zoo. Kim’s dad is also a big goofball and loves to chase Abby around. Kim’s sister lives in Boston, so we see her probably 2-4 times a year right now, but Kim and Allie text and talk on the phone regularly. Allie and Abby love each other and love to play dollhouse or cook things together.
We visit with Abby’s birth mom and family every 2-3 months. In between we love to share pictures and FaceTime. Abby’s birth family either visit us or we’ll drive to the east side to visit them, where we love to just hang out, play outside, and share lots of funny stories. We feel so lucky and fortunate to have such a good relationship with Abby’s birth mom and family.
Our Home & Neighborhood
We moved to our current house in 2020 and we really love it. Compared to our previous house, we have much more yard and some woods for Abby to run around and play. The house is also much more spacious, so when Abby is hyper Alex chases her around the house in circles for what seems like forever.
Abby and our next child will have their own rooms on the second floor. Alex and Kim’s room is on the main floor along with the kitchen and living room. The basement is finished and is filled with a bunch of Abby’s toys and Alex’s video gaming desk. There is a guest room in the basement as well that will also serve as Kim’s office in the future.
Our neighborhood is quiet with mature trees and a lot of other families. Across the road just happens to be a family that also has two adopted kids that are a bit older than Abby. We have great neighbors that we enjoy chatting with, and Abby loves to say hello to. Abby’s favorite part of the neighborhood is definitely going trick-or-treating on Halloween.
We enjoy going on walks with Abby. Sometimes we take a stroller and other times she wants to “run like the wind” to the local fenced-in pond to see if there are any ducks or frogs. The time she saw a muskrat was a big highlight for her.
One last perk of our property is there is a side driveway that is perfect for young kids to play. Abby rides her tricycle and scooter up and down without us having to worry about cars driving through. We get a lot of use out of it.
We have no plans to move any time soon. We really love our home and neighborhood.
Education
Education is very important to us.
Alex’s dad was a teacher and guidance counselor, so Alex’s dad instilled the importance of education from an early age. Alex remembers as a kid complaining about sweeping their pole barn, and Alex’s dad responded that if he didn’t want to do it his whole life he’ll need to get an education.
However education doesn’t have to mean 4+ years in college. For example skilled trades are excellent career options that are very rewarding. Our philosophy is that we’ll try to expose Abby and our next child to lots of different career options and interests, and we’ll do our best to support our kids in the path they choose.
Correction & Discipline
We do not use physical discipline like spanking at any time. With Abby we really try to connect with her, listen, and try to calmly discuss with her what’s going on and what needs to happen. Kim follows the “Big Little Feelings” Instagram page, which provides a lot of insight and helpful tips in this area.
When parenting a toddler though, at some point we do have to draw a line. If Abby is being stubborn or acting out, we will calmly explain expectations and count to 3. The key for us is if we get to 3 we follow through with whatever expectations were set, and Abby is good at understanding this. In calm moments, we take the time to explain to Abby consequences and expectations as well, so that she has tools to use in the future to avoid meltdowns.
We do our best to be kind to Abby and instill kindness in her. We emphasize asking and not demanding, saying please, thank you, you’re welcome, and excuse me. We’ve gotten a lot of nice comments from family, friends, and daycare teachers that Abby is kind and polite to others, especially for her age (3).
Our Faith Views
Alex is not religious, and Kim believes in God but does not take part in organized religion anymore.
Alex was raised Lutheran and enjoyed activities like youth group in high school, but in general does not believe in religion at this point. He is a strong believer in the power of science and continuing to improve our understanding of the universe. He also believes in being kind and caring for people regardless of religion.
Kim was raised Catholic and also enjoyed the community she felt in that experience. However as time has gone by, the negative aspects of organized religion has led to her not wanting to be involved any longer. Kim still prays and believes in God, but she doesn’t want to be involved with a church at this time.
Just like Alex, Kim also believes in being kind and caring for people regardless of religion, and that is something that we will instill in our children as well. Additionally, if our children show interest in learning more about religion as they get older, that is something that we will definitely support them in doing.
Alex's Career
I enjoy my job as a Production Engineer at Perrigo because the primary thing I do is help people. My job is to make the working life of manufacturing operators better by making tasks easier and more efficient, safer, and of higher quality. It’s a rewarding job because I get positive feedback when I complete a project. A simple example is operators were having to shovel a lot of powder for a particular process. I worked with the operators to come up with a different tool that was more like a rake and they absolutely loved it. They had less aches and pains doing this job and it was quicker too.
Perrigo will allow me to take 6 weeks paid off work after a child is placed in our home. I am very grateful for this since it’ll allow more bonding time than dads usually get. After the family leave is over, I will return to work while Kim stays home for her longer leave. Once Kim’s parental leave is done, our next child will go to our local daycare with Abby. We love our daycare. The teachers are so kind, thoughtful, and really care about the kids.
Kimberly's Career
I love that I have a career that helps provide medicine to people around the world. When I was college, I interned at a pharmaceutical company and instantly knew that was the industry that I wanted to continue my career. In my current role, I have great coworkers and a great team that I enjoy working with, which makes my job that much more fulfilling. My company is also very understanding of needing to take time off for appointments or to care for sick children, which is something that I very much appreciate.
My company will allow 12 weeks of paid parental leave following placement of a child, and I plan to take all of this time off. Following this parental leave, the child would attend the same daycare that our daughter currently goes to (a small, licensed daycare center close to our home and Alex’s workplace) and will also be taken care of by Alex’s parents periodically, likely once or twice a week.
Alex
My family is all from Michigan and has heritage from England, Ireland, and Slovenia. Our family loves getting together on holidays, with especially big get-togethers on the Fourth of July, Thanksgiving, and Christmas. Every year my parents host a big Fourth of July party – it used to be at their lake house but now they have a place with a pool. It’s great to hang out in the sun, play games in the pool, play yard games, and splash around with our daughter Abby.
Around Thanksgiving Kim and I either visit her family or mine, but there are always a ton of delicious dishes and desserts. Kim and Abby especially like the pumpkin pie. Around Christmas we exchange gifts with Kim’s family, have a delicious dinner with my family, and we visit Abby’s birth mom and her family too. This year Abby met Santa for the first time and I think she was a little star struck.
Kimberly
My family is from Michigan and my mother’s side of the family is German and Czech. My maternal grandmother is 100% Czech, and making traditional Czech baked goods is a big thing in our family. Even from a young age, I spent a lot of time with my mom and grandma baking, and that is something that our daughter Abby has already spent time doing with myself, my mom, and my grandma. Christmas was always a big deal for our family – it is my mom’s favorite holiday and she has definitely passed that down to me. One of my favorite traditions was having both sets of grandparents come over to our house on Christmas day for dinner.
In the last couple years, Alex and I have been able to start that same tradition by having our parents come over for Christmas dinner at our house, and it makes me very happy to be able to keep up with that tradition. Alex and I have started a couple of our own traditions over the years, including driving around town to look at Christmas lights on December 23rd while drinking hot cocoa and listening to Christmas music (we’ve continued this after Abby was born), and having “Ice Cream Fridays” with Abby in the summer where we either have ice cream at home or go to the local ice cream shop and hanging out at the park at the end of the week.
Thank you so much for considering us as adoptive parents. This time must be very difficult for you, but we hope we can give you peace of mind on one aspect of this process – if you choose us as adoptive parents, we’ll welcome you into our family (at your comfort level) just like we did with our daughter Abby’s birth mom. We see Abby’s birth mom often, and we are so grateful to have her in our lives and Abby’s life. We’d be happy to meet any time if you have any questions and to get to know us better. Whether you choose us or not, we wish you the best in this journey.
- Child Separation, Attachment, and Bonding
- Child Development, Including Safe Sleep Practices for Children
- Behavioral and Emotional Needs of Adoptive Children
- Impact of Adoption on the Family
Ideally we would love to be a part of each other’s families. It of course takes time, but we’ve built a great relationship with our daughter’s birth mom, and we’d love for our second adoption to have the same outcome. We hope to communicate and send photos often and visit in person often. We’d love to see you around holidays like Christmas and invite you over for birthday parties.
We’d love to get to know your family as well, and as long as you’re comfortable we’d love for you to meet our families too. We feel so fortunate that our first open adoption has gone so well. Based on that, you can have confidence that we truly want to build a great relationship with you so that you’re always in the child’s life.
OUR COMFORT LEVEL WITH DIFFERENT ADOPTION OPTIONS
- Very Comfortable
- Mostly Comfortable
- Unsure
- A Bit Uneasy
- Not Comfortable
Ideally we would love to be a part of each other’s families. It of course takes time, but we’ve built a great relationship with our daughter’s birth mom, and we’d love for our second adoption to have the same outcome. We hope to communicate and send photos often and visit in person often. We’d love to see you around holidays like Christmas and invite you over for birthday parties.
We’d love to get to know your family as well, and as long as you’re comfortable we’d love for you to meet our families too. We feel so fortunate that our first open adoption has gone so well. Based on that, you can have confidence that we truly want to build a great relationship with you so that you’re always in the child’s life.
Just one more thing...Ideally we would love to be a part of each other’s families. It of course takes time, but we’ve built a great relationship with our daughter’s birth mom, and we’d love for our second adoption to have the same outcome. We hope to communicate and send photos often and visit in person often. We’d love to see you around holidays like Christmas and invite you over for birthday parties.
We’d love to get to know your family as well, and as long as you’re comfortable we’d love for you to meet our families too. We feel so fortunate that our first open adoption has gone so well. Based on that, you can have confidence that we truly want to build a great relationship with you so that you’re always in the child’s life.