Marty & J.T.
Marty & J.T.
Several years ago, a friend asked us “When did you know you had found your person?” We shared the same story.
About a year into our relationship, JT was home from D.C. to celebrate Christmas with his family. He was home for about a week and we had spent much of the time together.
As J.T. got ready to fly back to D.C., we were saying our goodbyes outside as the snow fell. As we were hugging each other, we both began to cry. We both felt our hearts aching at the idea of being apart, not wanting to ever let the other go.
It was so clear in that moment that we were meant to spend the rest of our lives together and now, 10 years later, we are so grateful that we “found our person”.
Our Story
We met in 2012 at a coffee shop and quickly realized there was something special between us. We spent a little over a year becoming friends before we started dating each other. Our shared love of coffee turned into love for each other as we dated long distance for the next five years while JT worked in DC. Though the distance was difficult, it forced us to make the most of our time and enjoy all the memories we could make together.
We traveled between Chicago and D.C. almost every month, planned vacations, and talked on the phone every day. This challenge taught us that our time together is, and always will be, the most important thing to us. We closed the distance and moved in together in 2017, and got engaged in Ireland in 2019.
As we planned for our wedding in 2020, the pandemic created a lot of obstacles for us, including downsizing our guest list and moving it outdoors. On our wedding day, the forecast was not on our side. It rained throughout the morning and afternoon, requiring us to make several last-minute changes.
Amazingly, as our ceremony was starting, the rain stopped and the sun broke through the clouds as we said our vows. In many ways, the many speed bumps we faced planning our wedding has prepared us for parenting. We know there will be difficult moments but we will plan for rain, adjust, enjoy the bright spots, and focus on the love that holds us together.
Our Relaxation & Fun
We are both active people and enjoy getting out into nature. We live near the Indiana Dunes State Park and enjoy taking our dog, Lincoln, for hikes throughout the year, as well as regular walks through our neighborhood. Marty is a running enthusiast and loves working out, while also being an avid reader who can be found reading a book almost every day. JT enjoys baking bread and pastries and gardening in the summer. We grow tomatoes, bell peppers and herbs in the summer to make sauces, soups, and other dishes.
JT can often be found in the garden checking on what flowers are starting to bloom and tending to the vegetables. We both enjoy bike riding and take advantage of the many trails throughout our community. Our shared love of coffee continues to thrive as we always find new local coffee shops wherever we travel. We also enjoy exploring new places, road trips to visit friends who are no longer local, and spending time with our family and friends.
our adoption hopes
Gender: Any Gender, including an Ambiguous or Transitioning Gender Child
Ethnicities: Any Race and Ethnicity
Age: Newborn to 2 Years Old
Total of: 1 to 2 Children or 2 Siblings
a snapshot
of us
We Live In: Highland, IN
Our Faith: Catholic
Pets: Dog(s)
Kids Already: No Children Now
Child Care Plan: Family Member Child Care Licensed Child Care Center Licensed Child Care Home
Our Family & Friends
Our families are an important part of our lives and we are lucky to live close to both of our parents, with Marty’s parents only five miles away and J.T.’s parents about 30 minutes away. We see our families regularly and stay involved in each other’s lives, as “showing up” is an important value in both our families. “Showing up” means being there for your loved ones in good times and bad – whether it’s surgery or a celebration.
In addition to our parents, we both have siblings. Marty has a younger sister who lives in the Chicago suburbs with her husband and they are expecting their first child soon! J.T.’s siblings also live in the Chicago suburbs, an older brother and an older sister, who lives with her husband and their two boys. We love spending time with our nephews, are beyond excited to meet our new niece or nephew, and cannot wait to welcome a child of our own into our family.
Easter, Thanksgiving, and Christmas are always big family affairs and we try to see both families over the holidays – sharing potluck-style meals and lots of laughs!
We also have an amazing group of friends that we see about once a week, whether relaxing around a bonfire or grabbing dinner. Many of our friends have children of their own and we love watching them grow, teaching them new things, and just spending time with them (pumpkin patch trips are an all-time favorite).
Our Home & Neighborhood
We love our home and neighborhood, which is very walkable and has two parks with playgrounds, a bike trail, our local library branch and a cute downtown with restaurants and shops nearby. When school is in session, we can hear the roar of the fans and the marching band at the high school football games – a welcome reminder of our greater community.
Our community is where Marty grew up and we love the family-friendly atmosphere and the fact that we both have family and friends nearby. We appreciate that the towns that make up this area continue to have a small-town feel, while only 30 minutes from the excitement and culture of Chicago. Each town hosts festivals and concerts throughout the summer, including a family favorite – Pierogi Fest!
Our home is a ranch style house, on a quiet street with flowering gardens tended lovingly by JT. We have owned our home since 2012 and it has three bedrooms, with a room already picked out for our first child, a finished basement, and a three-season porch off our garage where we enjoy the seasons together. Our neighbors are of all walks of life from young to elderly.
We have several growing families on our street with school-aged children and we know our child will have lots of playmates nearby. We have several friends in the neighborhood who we see regularly for dinner and games and who we could call on if we needed help.
Education
We both value education and recognize the role that education played in our lives and in developing our passions. We believe education is more than just course work and think children need playtime to learn from other social experiences and enrich their development. Education is not limited to only those core subjects and we will encourage our child to be involved in art, music, sports, and extracurricular activities. We want our child to develop a well-rounded education to identify their passion and become the person they are meant to be. We will support them in every way, celebrate all their achievements, and always encourage them to explore.
Correction & Discipline
We’ve all been children and know kids misbehave, act out, get overly excited, and can make mistakes. This is a natural part of life and learning. We do not think physical discipline is appropriate and instead plan to set clear expectations for our child that are appropriate for their age. We want to model good behaviors for them, communicate with them on their level to ensure they feel understood and understand themselves, and demonstrate the good and bad things that come from our decisions. We want our child to learn from their mistakes and grow to become the best version of themselves.
Our Faith Views
We were both raised in the Catholic faith and attended mass regularly growing up. As we entered adulthood, we both felt less connected to the Church as our love was in conflict with the Catholic teachings. We both still believe in God, live our lives through faith, and uphold many of the values we learned from the Catholic church. As we grow as a family, we believe it is important to be a part of a faithful community and teach our child about God – his love and acceptance of all people.
Marty's Career
I am a Senior Training and Development Consultant for a teaching hospital in Chicago and have been with the organization for nine years. I create educational content and communication for the organization’s medical record system in addition to leading other IT projects. At times my job can be very technical.
I enjoy and take pride in the role I play to improve patient care throughout the hospital. The educational content I create provides critical information to our doctors, nurses and other clinicians, who use that knowledge to be more efficient and effective in their day-to-day work – resulting in a better experience for our patients.
I intend to take at least 6 weeks of paternal leave following placement, before returning to work full-time. My job allows me to work remotely most days (I go into the office 1-2 times/month) and provides flexible work hours, which will allow me to start my workdays earlier to accommodate our family’s needs.
I am a morning person and will be in charge of early morning care and daycare drop-off, while JT will manage afternoon pick-up and care for our child. Additionally, my parents are retired and live nearby and are excited to care for their new grandchild during the workday until we can enter our child into a licensed childcare center.
J.T.'s Career
I currently lead state and local public policy and advocacy for a Michigan-based community development financial institution. My company supports affordable housing and economic development throughout the great lakes and mid-Atlantic regions. I love that my role allows me to help shape public policy to solve some of the most important needs of families and communities.
Advocacy is a big part of my job and I enjoy connecting the stories of individuals and communities to help policymakers understand the real-life impact of these policies.
When we are placed with a child, I plan to take parental leave before returning to work full-time. My job provides a flexible work schedule which will allow me to manage afternoon pick-up and care as well as medical appointments as needed. We also plan to rely on our parents for immediate childcare needs while we find the perfect licensed childcare provider during our work hours.
Marty
I was born and raised in Northwest Indiana, near where my parents were also born and raised. My family is Polish and Slovak and most have remained near the area, so we have a great network of extended family for holidays, get-togethers, and game nights.
My favorite family tradition is apple picking in the fall. Many of my extended family get together in southwest Michigan to enjoy time together at the orchard, often expanding to include friends of the family as well. We have a “everyone is family” mentality and love sharing our fun traditions with those in our lives. The apple picking is promptly followed by a delicious burger at Redamak’s and an ice cream treat at Oink’s, two staples in New Buffalo, Michigan.
J.T.
My family is primarily of German and Irish ancestry. I was born and raised in the western suburbs of Chicago and my parents were born and raised in southern Indiana and moved to the Chicagoland area when they married.
My favorite family tradition is our annual camping trip over Labor Day weekend with extended family. We have been camping at the same lake for 34 years and it has turned into a sort of family reunion, with about 35 members of the family making the trip to spend quality time together. We spend our days enjoying the lake and evenings telling stories (and eating smores) around the campfire.
Thank you for taking the time to meet our family! We are excited to be on our journey to parenthood and appreciate you learning more about us. We truly value the decision you are making and are simply in awe of the strength you have. We know it is the ultimate act of love and we would be honored if you choose to trust us with raising your child. We can only begin to imagine how emotional this time and decision must be for you. Our arms are outstretched to you and we are ready to walk this journey with you.
We promise to provide your child with a safe and happy home, filled with love and acceptance, and to help them grow and achieve their dreams. We hope to have an open adoption and cannot wait to welcome your child and you into our family. We believe it is in the child’s best interest to remain connected to their birth family. However, we understand your views may be different and we will respect your wishes. At the very least, we want to share your story with the child, so they know the loving sacrifice you made.
- Child Separation, Attachment, and Bonding
- Child Development, Including Safe Sleep Practices for Children
- Behavioral and Emotional Needs of Adoptive Children
- Impact of Adoption on the Family
We believe an ideal birth family relationship is built on trust as well as open and honest communication. Early on, we hope to have opportunities to get together with you and build a relationship over time. We hope to visit a few times a year and are open to experience based visits to bond over memories. When we can’t be in person we hope to share photos and communicate regularly.
We hope our profile emphasized how much we value family and we look forward to growing our family to include a child and you as their birth family.
OUR COMFORT LEVEL WITH DIFFERENT ADOPTION OPTIONS
We are open to adjusting our comfort level as we develop a relationship. We marked this one as “fairly comfortable” as we usually open our home to close friends and family and hope to have a similar relationship with the birth family.
- Very Comfortable
- Mostly Comfortable
- Unsure
- A Bit Uneasy
- Not Comfortable
We believe an ideal birth family relationship is built on trust as well as open and honest communication. Early on, we hope to have opportunities to get together with you and build a relationship over time. We hope to visit a few times a year and are open to experience based visits to bond over memories. When we can’t be in person we hope to share photos and communicate regularly.
We hope our profile emphasized how much we value family and we look forward to growing our family to include a child and you as their birth family.
Just one more thing...We believe an ideal birth family relationship is built on trust as well as open and honest communication. Early on, we hope to have opportunities to get together with you and build a relationship over time. We hope to visit a few times a year and are open to experience based visits to bond over memories. When we can’t be in person we hope to share photos and communicate regularly.
We hope our profile emphasized how much we value family and we look forward to growing our family to include a child and you as their birth family.