Phil & Rachel
Phil & Rachel
“Wanna hear a joke?” That was how it began for us back in middle school. Phil stood up in band class to share a joke with everyone. He was giggling before he could even get it started. Rachel rolled her eyes. “This boy is so obnoxious,” she thought. The teacher gave a sigh and said, “Sure Phil, but make it quick.” Phil grinned, he knew this was gonna be good. “Alright. How do you catch a polar bear?” The class snickered.
They had no idea, but they knew Phil, the class clown, was up to something. “I don’t know, how do you catch one?” the teacher replied. “Well…” he began, “First you have to cut a hole in the ice. Then, you’re going to need a can of peas so you can dump the peas into the hole. Don’t worry, the peas will float.” Phil paused for effect. “Okay,” the teacher said, “let’s wrap this up.” Phil smirked, “Well, when the polar bear goes to take a pea, you kick him in the ice hole… BAHAHAHAHA!!!”
Let’s just say the teacher was not pleased. “PHIL! That’s totally inappropriate!” Phil couldn’t stop laughing. “That’s it!” the teacher said, “you’re sitting up in front with the clarinets for the rest of the week!” Phil looked over at the clarinet section and there was a beautiful brown-haired girl named Rachel. He brought his chair over next to hers. “Hi! Can I sit here?” …And the rest is history.
Our Story
We are best friends who met in middle school band class. We started dating our junior year of high school. Phil proposed on Christmas of 2006 and we were married at a beautiful Christmas ceremony in December of 2007. We are fortunate to be each other’s favorite person.
We have always dreamed of starting a family together and adoption has always been one of our goals. We take time to talk to each other and share about our days. We are intentional about gauging how the other is feeling and try to support each other every day.
Our Relaxation & Fun
We enjoy spending time together playing board games, watching tv, going for walks, visiting friends and family, and especially trying new restaurants in Grand Rapids. We love good food! :) We love playing fetch with our two golden retrievers, Lionel Richie and Pam Beesly (yes, those are their real names).
We also love spending time apart! Everybody needs alone time and we try to give each other space to enjoy time on their own. Phil likes to play video games and board games with his friends. Rachel love to go camping, read books, and try new recipes.
our adoption hopes
Gender: Any Gender, including an Ambiguous or Transitioning Gender Child
Ethnicities: Any Race and Ethnicity
Age: Newborn to an Older Child
Total of: 1 to 3 Children or 3 Siblings
a snapshot
of us
We Live In: Grand Rapids
Our Faith: Christian
Pets: Dog(s)
Kids Already: No Children Now
Child Care Plan: Stay-at-Home Parent
Our Family & Friends
We are both close with our parents. Phil’s parents are divorced, but they get along really well. Rachel’s parents have been married for 38 years. Phil is an only child, but Rachel has two sisters. They both are married and have children of their own, all under the age of 6.
We love to spend time with both our family and friends playing games, going out to eat, sitting around a campfire, and just being together. It’s very important to us that our future children get to experience the love and belonging and friendships that can happen in a healthy family environment. We plan on many future play dates and sleepovers with our friends and family.
Our Home & Neighborhood
We live in the Creston neighborhood north of downtown Grand Rapids. It’s a lovely, quiet community with friendly neighbors. It’s a super fantastic place to live. There are lots of parks, people walking, kids playing, etc.
We have a 1940s bungalow home with 3 bedrooms and 1 bathroom. We live on a corner lot with a big yard with plenty of space for our yearly garden. Homegrown tomatoes, yum! Our home has a bedroom set aside as a nursery as well as a large upstairs office and play area.
Education
Education is the key to opportunities, and therefore we both place a very high value on education. We recognize all children learn differently, but all children can learn if they are given the right tools and chances. We recognize and value each child’s talents and abilities and will foster their passions.
We want our children to be curious and experiment with the world around them. We will try to use every opportunity we can to teach our children new words, new colors, new ideas, new ways to think. We do not believe education should tell children what to think, but how.
Correction & Discipline
The role of discipline in a child’s life should be to teach, guide, protect and provide structure. Discipline from a parent is the precursor to a child developing self-regulation, so they can manage and understand their emotions in a healthy way.
We will use discipline to teach boundaries and establish what is safe and good for our children to say and do. That will be our job until our children have the ability/skills to do it themselves. Discipline should always be done with a heart of love and kindness. We will use redirection, timeouts, and loss of privileges.
Our Faith Views
We were both raised in Christian homes. Our parents used Christianity to teach us morality but also about love and grace and acceptance. Now that we’re older, we attend a United Methodist church downtown about twice every month. The biggest role religion plays in our lives now is to model ourselves after the example of Jesus: Be kind, have an open mind, and show love and grace to everyone.
With our family, we will try to make the world around us a better place for the disenfranchised and forgotten. Although we are of a Christian mindset, we accept all faiths and believe spirituality is a personal and individualized journey. Our children will be allowed to explore whatever that means for them in their own life with encouragement and guidance.
Phil's Career
I love working with middle schoolers and high schoolers. It’s a fantastic age where kids are becoming individuals and finding themselves. I love that my job is to be a part of that. I also really love to teach. It’s exciting when I get to help students discover new things on their own.
I teach from home for a virtual school. This is on purpose! My wife and I decided this was the best way for us to be home with our future children as much as possible while they’re young. Many of my coworkers have babies or small children with them at home while they work. It’s difficult but absolutely doable. I’m looking forward to being home with my children rather than away from them all day.
Rachel's Career
I have worked in healthcare since I was 19 years old. From that point on, I knew that caring for elderly patients was something I wanted to continue pursuing. I now work as a hospice nurse.
As I witness the death and dying experiences of my patients and their families, I have come to understand what an important and sacred role hospice services can play in promoting spiritual, relational, and physical peace at end-of-life. I chose to pursue hospice with the hope that I could help provide this peace. It is a great honor to walk with my patients and their loved ones through some of life’s most difficult moments.
I work part-time on night shift. This schedule allows me to be at home during the day, with the flexibility to provide stay-at-home childcare.
Phil
I was born in Virginia, and moved to Michigan when I was 5 years old. My family, both my Mom’s and Dad’s side, is of European descent. My mom and dad live nearby and I see them regularly. My extended family was a large part of my growing up years.
I am an only child, but my cousins were like my brothers and we did everything together. My Dad’s side of the family still gathers for Christmas and also a family reunion. We share a big meal and spend time laughing and reminiscing on our shared memories.
Rachel
I was born and raised in Michigan. My family heritage includes German, Irish, French-Canadian, and Native American ancestry. My parents have been married for 38 years. I have two younger sisters who are both married. I also have two nephews and two nieces. My family also includes grandparents and many aunts, uncles, and cousins.
One of my favorite family traditions is our annual camping trip that my dad’s parents started over 40 years ago! My extended family still spends ten days every July together at Higgins Lake. We love spending time together visiting, boating, sitting around the campfire, and relaxing with each other.
We want you to know we are so sorry you are facing so many difficult decisions right now. It must be terribly exhausting and complicated and scary. We hope that you are feeling loved and supported throughout this journey, and we wish the very best for you and your baby – no matter what path you choose to take.
If adoption is the path that you choose, we would consider it the greatest privilege to welcome you both into our family. Our intent is to remain open and see you involved in whichever ways you are comfortable and able throughout the years. Above all, we want you to know that this is a commitment we are coming into wholeheartedly. We have centered our family around the values of fun, curiosity, kindness, acceptance, and unconditional love and we would be overjoyed to bring a child into the environment we have intentionally created. We promise to love, cherish, and nurture a child in every way we possibly can.
Thank you so much for taking the time to look at our profile and learn a little bit about our story. If you think we might be a good match, we would love to meet.
- Child Separation, Attachment, and Bonding
- Child Development, Including Safe Sleep Practices for Children
- Behavioral and Emotional Needs of Adoptive Children
- Impact of Adoption on the Family
We want you to feel comfortable to share in the child’s life, in whatever capacity you desire. We want you to trust us with the child and we want to trust you. We want to be honest and transparent as we navigate the adoption process. We understand it will be incredibly unique and possibly even difficult.
We want a partner in this, if you choose to be an active partner with us. However, we will hold no grudges or ill-feelings toward you if you decide to keep your distance. We just want you to know you are welcome and invited.
OUR COMFORT LEVEL WITH DIFFERENT ADOPTION OPTIONS
- Very Comfortable
- Mostly Comfortable
- Unsure
- A Bit Uneasy
- Not Comfortable
We want you to feel comfortable to share in the child’s life, in whatever capacity you desire. We want you to trust us with the child and we want to trust you. We want to be honest and transparent as we navigate the adoption process. We understand it will be incredibly unique and possibly even difficult.
We want a partner in this, if you choose to be an active partner with us. However, we will hold no grudges or ill-feelings toward you if you decide to keep your distance. We just want you to know you are welcome and invited.
Just one more thing...We want you to feel comfortable to share in the child’s life, in whatever capacity you desire. We want you to trust us with the child and we want to trust you. We want to be honest and transparent as we navigate the adoption process. We understand it will be incredibly unique and possibly even difficult.
We want a partner in this, if you choose to be an active partner with us. However, we will hold no grudges or ill-feelings toward you if you decide to keep your distance. We just want you to know you are welcome and invited.